Redefining success and high performance.
My career as an executive assistant began in the same way so many others experience:
on the job learning
watching and listening
handovers featuring the bare bones of information and how-to for systems
figuring everything else out along the way with a lot of stress, pressure and anxiety
never being completely sure that I was doing everything the ideal or perfect way
Perhaps the most difficult aspect of the training in my early career was around the expectations of me. I was trained to believe that:
If I didn't sacrifice personal time, I didn't have my "skin in the game"
If I was anything less than perfect, I wouldn't be valued or respected
If the needs of the people I supported weren't my primary focus, I would never be successful
If I made a mistake it would be the end of the world
I had to magically know everything, without ever being taught, shown or included
I had to be available at all times
My role was to be in the shadows, seen but not heard
I was led to believe that I could not do my job if I showed up any other way.
This conditioning, on top of the day-to-day realities of being an assistant, created a very unhealthy view of what high performance meant.
As a result I gave more of myself to my work than was healthy (click here to listen to my podcast ep on this).
I showed up when my family needed me, when I was on leave, when I was ill and when I was grieving.
I was perpetually 'on'.
My salaries and performance reviews reflected that I was valued as a high performer, but it felt hollow.
I never felt that I could rest easy, taking comfort from this alone.
My career ended up making me sick.
I burned out twice, 13 years apart.
And burnout is currently RIFE in the administration community globally. If you’re curious about why, tune into this.
This is what makes me feel really sad when I reflect on my own career: nobody ever told me that it really doesn't have to be that way. I only saw the alternative role modelled twice by executives in my 27 year career, toward the end.
I wish someone had helped me understand that I didn't have to give as much of myself to be a great assistant.
That I didn't have to reach burnout twice to be valued at work.
We're in the era of The Great Resignation, Quiet Quitting, "Lazy Girl Jobs" and the "Snail Girl".
A bucking of the ways of working that demanded we give everything of ourselves to our work and sacrifice what we need to thrive.
But slowing down, stopping, checking out or leaving still doesn't fix the problem.
The pressures don't go away.
Avoidance creates even more pressure and stress.
We have to know how to design our careers and our ways of working to support us to thrive on our terms.
The hustle and grind culture doesn’t fit in today’s world.
Unlocking your full potential can mean being a high performer in an authentic and balanced way. One that allows you AND your employer to thrive. A state of being where you don’t sacrifice your wellbeing to be rewarded and valued.
In a world where we already face pressure to be more Everything, I want you to know you can have the career you want, on your terms and that you are already good enough, exactly as you are.
Your career should not be making you sick and you should not be giving so much of yourself away for the benefit of others that it’s at the detriment of your wellbeing.
Finding your way to that level of authenticity in the most misunderstood professional in the corporate world can feel overwhelming .
Here are some practical tips to get you started:
Spend some time considering your current state.
Reflect on where your work feels out of alignment.
Where do you feel sapped by what you do?
And what would change if you did something differently around this? Something that meets YOUR needs.
What could healthy high performance look like for you?
When we can reset the baseline of what fulfilment, satisfaction, purpose, balance, recognition and reward means to us, then we have a tangible goal post to work toward.
My shift began with boundaries, being less "on", not being available to everyone and unravelling my perfectionistic tendencies that weren't serving me.
Next think about the sense of responsibility and pressure you feel as an assistant.
Is this pressure all of yours to wear?
Are YOU accountable for the responsibility, or is it someone else’s?
Are you absorbing the stress of others?
Can you differentiate between someone else’s pressure/stress and yours?
What mindset work or mindfulness activities can you build into your day to offset or shed this?
How can you protect your energy and maintain equilibrium?
Now think about how you can work smarter, not harder.
Where are the knowledge gaps that are creating time and energy leaks for you, and;
what will be the quickest way to plug the gap so you have some much needed relief?
Think about the expectations that create angst for you.
Are they self-imposed?
Are they realistic?
Are you suffering from perfectionistic tendencies, fear of failure or self-criticism?
Can you practice self compassion, understanding that to fail is to be human?
Could you give yourself permission to take a break when you need it?
What boundaries can you set to protect your energy?
Now consider the support you need to overcome any challenges or blocks.
Is there some reading, watching or listening on a specific theme that will help you shift your mindset?
Can you find a formal or informal mentor to guide you?
Could you have an honest conversation with your manager about how you feel right now?
Could you share you are beyond capacity work-wise and feel it is unsustainable?
What formal and informal development do you need to create less stress in your working life?
Finding the right support for you
It’s my mission to support assistants to work smarter, not harder and focus on their talents and strengths to create maximum impact.
I support assistants to find their rock-solid self belief, cut the self-criticism, to show up authentically, to have healthy boundaries and to vocalise their needs and wants.
This creates liberation. A freedom from the anxiety and overwhelm an assistant career can create and having a sustainable career that feels easy, rewarding and supports balance.
There are currently a few ways to work with me:
Inside the Elite EA Academy
Private mentoring (full for 2023)
And consulting with organisations to reduce reactivity, correct organisational dysfunction, and to create the conditions that allow everyone to thrive at work.
You can read more about my mission, values, point of difference and credentials here
More insights to support you
You can hear my perspective on all things career success, mindset and wellbeing on my podcast, What It Means To Be Well
Read more insights from me at Forbes Australia
