why you need an energetic distance from your executive.
One reason so many assistants experience burnout is due to identifying too closely with the executive they support. Let me explain.
When an assistant has a great partnership with their executive there's an unusual (mostly unspoken) closeness and bond. It was certainly my experience in many of the senior roles I held in my career.
Here's how it happens:
You're "in the tent" in the way that nobody else in the organisation is.
The visibility you have of their world is unique. You'll experience things together that few others, even their peers, truly understand.
They'll share with you things they might not share with anyone else in their work world.
You carry the silent weight of the burdens of others. You’re a trusted advisor to many and the keeper of more secrets than possibly even HR or general counsel.
You see the aftermath of the difficult conversations with your exec’s CEO or Chair when there's been a disappointment.
You see how much of themselves they give to their work, the hours they do, how hard they try - even if they don't always get it right.
Having this experience, bond and visibility, it’s natural that you WANT them to succeed, you WANT to ease their stress, you WANT to protect their brand and profile.
That’s in the DNA of every exceptional assistant - to be invested in enabling the success of their executive.
THIS is where things become murky for many assistants: not keeping an energetic distance.
It's an art to be an in-service role supporting someone so well that they're able to thrive and maintain your own wellbeing, boundaries, sense of self and balance at the same time.
So while the year is still fresh, I want to share a reminder for all the assistants and admin business partners that put all their skin in the game at work every day.
Your responsibility is this:
➡ Understanding the pressure and stress others are experiencing, where it is coming from and why;
➡ Then knowing how to create ease, flow and reduce friction and pressure points to solve it so priorities are protected
➡ Using EQ to do it in an efficient, effective way that protects relationships and engagement
Your responsibility is not:
➡ To associate your identity with that of whom you support
➡ To wear/feel everyone else's pressure and stress in a personal way
➡ To allow open season on your time and energy outside the business day
➡ Putting the wellbeing and needs of others ahead of your own
➡ Being boundary-less to show your commitment
➡ To lose your sense of self so that others can succeed
➡ To pause or stunt your own development and progression when your aspirations are bigger than your current role - it's not disloyal to crave expansion, even if that means leaving your executive
If you want to approach the year with intention, consider this.
✅ What do YOU want most in your career this year?
✅ And what would thriving feel like for you?
✅ Make yourself one commitment to honour that beginning today.
Need support? My wellbeing workshops for admin professionals address the unique challenge the profession faces and are brimming with research, evidence and practical tips and strategies to help you and your team thrive. We also cover this in The Elite EA Academy and I offer community classes on topics like this for free throughout the year. Explore the website to subscribe to the newsletter or see the current offerings.
Remember, being in an in-service role doesn’t mean you’re required to minimise your needs, wants and priorities. Actively practice balance and career longevity, fulfilment and personal career success will follow.
